Take Time to Deliberate....

I realize no one can get inside my head except me.

Thus, no one can really understand the questions and struggles.
Nor can they come up with the solution.

Part of that problem is that as people we so rarely really listen.
I don't care what the topic...theology, car mechanics, fencing....
....we sit prepared with our pat "sunday school" answer that we have in our heads...
...and we spew it out regardless of whether or not it actually pertains to the question.....
And we feel great about ourselves, assume the other person is just an idiot if they don't get our terrific answer and go our merry way.

But we have not heard nor touched the heart.

God spare me from living this way towards others.
Especially towards those I love.

Realizing this, I understand that I alone can solve my fencing questions.
I, really, am the only one inside my head.
I alone know how I process and how I tick.
And the way I do it just is ok. I need to grasp this reality.
Even if it means I have to analyze fencing to death, pick it apart and then apply it.

Sort of like Napoleon Bonaparte saying:

"Take time to deliberate, but when the time for action has arrived, stop thinking and go in."

I have failed to take the time to deliberate.
I stopped thinking, I detoured off of what I knew I needed to do, and now the consequences are rearing their ugly heads. Mostly in my own attitude.

I need the time to deliberate so that when the time for action comes, I can go in.

And that's ok.
It's just me.
And that really is ok.
Hm.

It's true for fencing.

It's also true for my relationship with God.

But that's a whole 'nother blog......